People simply don’t realise they are doing this but they are actually stopping themselves from succeeding with the little things they say to themselves or out loud. This can be HUGELY detrimental to their business or their success in everything they do.
Let me explain to you what happened:
Because of the industry I am in (lifestyle and luxury), I get invited to a lot of supercar events. This one in particular was being held at the ‘Top Gear’ test track. For those ‘petrol heads’ out there you will know what this is, for everyone else, it’s basically a race track.
This is the actual car from the story
I was watching some of the most fantastic machines going round the track, Ferrari’s, McLarens, Lamborghini’s etc. But there was a particular favorite of mine. A green Lamborghini Aventador. This is a seriously awesome machine and one of my favorite cars of all time. It’s absolutely gorgeous! Even the colour!!
The noise it made was simply incredible and everyone was watching it go round.
Then this fantastic moment happened when I heard a gentleman standing behind me say… ‘I will NEVER be able to afford one of those’.
I looked around at this gentleman who was about 30 years old and I looked at him and grinned. I grinned and I felt almost sorry for him. I was thinking, you are right, you won’t be able to afford one of those cars.
Now that may sound a bit strange and even a bit arrogant but there was a simple reason why I looked at him (normally I would have just ignored a comment like that). But this was something I had been waiting to hear for a while…
I had just heard someone actually telling themselves and everyone around them that they cannot do something! It really annoyed me and I just thought, ‘You are right, you won’t be able to afford one of them – BECAUSE you have just told yourself that you won’t’.
You see, I am no mindset expert, but I have come to realise something throughout my journey in business. Our brains are seriously powerful!!!
You might not think that this is important, but think about what you say and when you say it…
Do you ever say, ‘I can’t do that’ or ‘I wouldn’t be able to do that’ or something similar? You might not think you do this but I bet you do it a lot more than you realise.
The reason you don’t think you say it is because you probably do it subconsciously! You are literally limiting what you can do because you are convincing yourself that you can’t do it. It’s madness when you think about it.
Now I know first hand that this gentleman could in fact afford this Lamborghini, not because I knew him but because I know that anyone can afford that Lamborghini if they work on getting the money to pay for it.
It’s not rocket science, if you want to buy something you need to have the money to buy it, borrow or otherwise. He would just need to think differently and find out the method to get him there.
Put it like this: The owner of that Lamborghini would have seen that car in a showroom one day and said – ‘I want to own one of those one day’ or ‘I will go out and buy that next month’.
It’s just a case of mindset, self-belief and the ability to take action.
Now, some of you might be thinking, well the owner of that Lamborghini already had the money didn’t he?! Yes perhaps – BUT chances are that he had the same thoughts about a different car when he was 30 years old (just like the man mentioned above) but the Lamborghini Owner had a totally different outlook and said ‘I will buy one of those one day’ and guess what… He did…
And do you want to know my thoughts on what the negative chap achieved? Nothing… He just convinced himself in about 3 seconds that he wasn’t ever going to own one of those stunning cars.
This is so true. So make sure you think about what you are saying to yourself and to the people around you. Is it a true reflection on what you really want to achieve in your life or are you saying things subconsciously and thinking about them afterwards?
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5 Responses to Are You Subconsciously Forcing Yourself To Fail?
Ben you are absolutely right. We all do this but some of us realize our mistake and correct it or modify how we say something. This is similar to a person who says “it must be nice.” Yes it must be and you’ll never know with an attitude like that. Rather than saying “it must be nice” wouldn’t it be better to say “that will be nice”? That’s how I work toward my success.
Twitter: AskWhatNext
I think forcing yourself to succeed is more stress and more possibility to fail. Just give
all the best you can without forcing yourself.
Hi Tanny,
Our self-talk is so important. It often comes about. We need to keep it positive.
Well done to being alert to this. When you begin to listen to others self-talk it helps keep our own in sync.
John Davis recently posted..Seeing Beliefs
Twitter: woonah
Just like the Big Bang Theory was scoffed at originally, so to is The Law of Attraction.
Words and thoughts are so powerful. If you don’t believe in yourself, in our capabilities, in your potential…WHO WILL??
Great post!
Keith Punches recently posted..Networking basics for introverted Jobseekers
Twitter: keithpunches
What is this obsession with material things? It worries me that everybody is now programmed to want ‘objects’ Advertising and the media have created this illness. What has happened to inner happiness? Killing yourself to obtain difficult to obtain objects is just plain silly. This ‘Drive’ for the accumulation of these things is just another stressor you do not need. How many rich people are truly happy? You are missing the most important thing in life, just live life on your own terms and be happy. Who cares if you got a Lambo or a scooter. They both get you from A to B.
I think people were a lot happier without all this crap we have nowadays. I will NEVER be a slave to ‘things’ There, now that’s something that does not cost a lot to achieve.